Oh man, I don’t think I have been this busy since.. well, never. I don’t think I have ever had nearly as many things, at once, on my “To-Do List”. I have one hundred and fifteen items to list on eBay. I have thirty people to shop, make, box and gift wrap presents for for the Holidays. I have family Christmas cards to create, envelope, address, stamp and mail. I have a pile of laundry taller than me that needs washing, drying, folding, organizing and putting away. I have a magical sink that refills itself with dishes faster than I can load and unload the dishwasher. I have a dog that needs to be walked three times a day, fed, watered, and played with. A daughter who never stops moving. She has “homework” assignments that must be completed and a million and one little games, tasks, and stories she wants to share with me. She needs feeding and bathing and a massive amount of attention. I have a bird and a guinea pig that eat faster than I can feed them – they also need water and cleaning. I have a Roger who needs to be fed nightly (thankfully, my version is pretty self sufficient and I don’t need to do much more than that for his upkeep.) Then my office needs organizing. I have artwork of Mia’s that needs to be framed and hung up. I have a sensory nook to plan and create. I have blog entries to write and a book of the month to suggest. And of course, grocery shopping and every other little chore – like sweeping and washing the floor, cleaning the toilets and bathtub, picking up toys, etc. It’s never ending really.
But, along with the never ending list of tasks I have to complete comes a happiness I haven’t felt since… well, never. Just when you would think the monotony of daily life should have set in and I should feel lost, despairing even. I’m not. I don’t. I feel exhilarated by the sheer amount of things I have to do. I feel immensely satisfied in my ability to handle so much on my plate at once. To not just handle it, but to execute each task easily and effectively. For me, this is no small feat. I can’t help but think that if I had had this many things on my plate a little over a year ago I wouldn’t have been able to accomplish any of them. Not one single thing. I would have become overwhelmed and exhausted even thinking about all of it. I would have made a list and not crossed off one single thing on it. Except the first thing I always write for good measure – “1) Write To-Do List.” Hey, I like to start my list off on a positive note by allowing myself to instantly cross something off it – there’s nothing wrong with that. Right?
I’m not sure what changed. I really don’t know. Maybe I’ve grown up a bit. Maybe I’ve finally realized that along with any little task is an opportunity for accomplishment. And with accomplishment always comes pride. Is that silly of me? Is it silly of me to be proud of myself when I actually finish all the laundry, fold it and put it away? Probably. But at the same time if you saw the state of my laundry pile for three and a half long years you would too be proud of me. Is it silly for me to be proud of myself for actually organizing and re-launching a business of mine that I found too overwhelming a year and a half ago and quit doing – leaving the massive amount of vintage goods I had to grow dusty and older in the numerous bins hiding in my basement? Or should I be ashamed that I found it too overwhelming to keep up with in the first place? Who knows. Maybe I should have felt defeated instead of motivated to try again. Maybe I should feel embarrassed instead of accomplished, but the truth is I don’t. The truth is I’m proud of my new found ability to juggle many tasks with ease. I’m proud of my growth. I’m proud of all of my accomplishments – no matter how trivial. I’m proud of me.